A few weeks ago, I read Deuteronomy 30:11-20 and was really impacted by the entire passage (you can read it all here). The last verses, especially, reminded me that running after anything other than God is really running after destruction. “This day I call heaven and earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live and that you may love the LORD your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the LORD is your life…”
In all honesty, the past month has been difficult for me. I have been really, really missing friends. You know, the kind that you just call up and freak out with when you discover a dead cat on your entry mat in the morning; or the kind you call and cry with when that very same day, you accidentally drive over another cat and have to watch it suffer and die. Yeah, that was a bad day. I miss my friends who have known me forever and heard me vent about a million things and still love me, even when we disagree with each other. Yep, I miss you all. To the point that sometimes I want to forget it all and move back.
I clearly need God to remind me that He is the one who blessed me with all of my friends, both the old ones and my new, beginning friendships here. He is the one equipping me to submit to a new culture and discover a new way of friendship. He led me to remember that He alone is my life. Not friends, not family, not activities…those are incredible blessings, but they should not be the source of my life or my contentment.
With the little phrase “For the LORD is your life” as a recurring prayer, I had the opportunity to share the message at horse ministry a week ago. I spoke about this Deuteronomy passage, (but only after seriously considering something else because “Deuteronomio” is hard to say in Spanish). Seriously. We talked about choices, played some fun games with silly choices, and then talked about the most important choice we ever make…Life or Death. God or something else. I was speaking to myself as much as anyone else there. But then God did something that made my loneliness worth every second. One of the adults who had come with some children was crying after the talk. He told me it was a beautiful talk and that he wanted life but didn’t know how to draw near to God. Miguel, one of our Ranch staff, was sitting with us, and he started sharing the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Others in our community joined in, answering questions, and we were all soon rejoicing with our new brother in Christ.
We sang this song as a prayer. And the Holy Spirit encouraged my heart.
Renuevame Señor Jesus, ya no quiero ser igual (Renew me, Lord Jesus, I don’t want to be the same)
Renuevame Señor Jesus, pon en mi tu corazon (Renew me, Lord Jesus, put your heart in mine)
Porque todo lo que hay dentro de mi (Because everything there is inside of me)
Necesita ser cambiado Señor (Needs to be changed, Lord)
Porque todo lo que hay dentro de mi corazon (Because everything there is in my heart)
Necesita mas de ti (Needs more of you)